This is Power

When someone spreads vicious rumors about you that have no basis in fact, when someone acts purely for spite, or to disrupt, or “because they care,” your response should be…


Silence.


Do not protest. Do not defend. Do not retaliate. Tell your friends, your confidantes, your lover. But keep your public voice quiet.

          But it’s not true! My reputation is…

Your reputation is just fine. Because the rumors aren’t true. And everyone who knows you, everyone who matters, knows they aren’t true. You have integrity, character, and class. Do not let the shouting voices of disapproval drown out your progress, your work, your worth.

          But…they lied. They need to know….

They need to know that you are Teflon and unpredictable. Imagine what they will think when you say nothing. When you just go about your business doing good works, raising your child, enjoying your life, unscathed. They will wonder if you will say something. When you will say something. What you might say. And to whom. Let them wonder. Let them have the headaches and the stress and the stomach knots. They’ve earned it.

          But I’ve spent the past two days angrier than I’ve ever been…and crying. I’ve cried so much…

So now it’s out of your system. Good. Now let it go. For the sake of your sanity, stress level, health, and self-esteem, let it go. Do not let your enemies win by showing them they have disrupted your enjoyment of life.

          She hates me.

Yes. She hates you. She will always hate you because you cannot change the things that she hates. She hates your very existence. There will always be people who dislike you, who will talk about you negatively behind your back, who will wish you ill will and try to break you. Do not give them the satisfaction.

          Take the high road?

The hard road, yes. Hold your head up and go about your business and your life. Live, work, love, and keep doing what you do. The people around you see. They see that your enemies are cruel and uncaring. Troublemakers. They see that you remain silent, remain in a good mood, remain productive, and they start to see your critics differently. No longer trustworthy, those gossips continue to lose credibility with every forward step you take.

          I was hurt.

Yes. Blind attacks can be the most painful. But they must also be endured. Only engage with people and situations that are transparent and in your field of vision. Those proverbial slings and arrows sting and grind away at your spirit, but these are surface wounds. Only you can let them go any deeper. You are in control, even if you don’t feel it.

          How can I be in control if I feel like everything is falling apart. People will think less of me…

…if you engage in a protestation defense, yes. They will think better of you if you take the hits and just keep going. Accept that there will always be people who will dislike you, talk about you, want to disrupt your life. Your reaction will determine your course. If you choose the high road, the hard road, and just keeping walking the path, unwilling to let these small minds distract you, this is Power.

For my friends. Much love.